For The Men: Happy Wife, Happy Life

I'm so in love with my beautiful wife Dionn aka Mrs. Williams. She has been there for me through the thick and thin. She's been there to understand me all the way through when no one else does. I know that we are one in spirit, soul, and body. I know that she is a gift from God I must cherish for the rest of my days. This weekend, we will have the opportunity to reconnect and cherish one another. One thing I've learned in our almost 9 years of being together is to make sure my wife is happy. When she's happy life is happy and vice versa. One thing that makes my wife happy is when I listen to what she has to say. I know that I have a virtuous woman in my house. She always gives it to me straight. Whether it's telling me how to fold clothes, how to wash clothes, how to present her plate to her at dinner time, how to dress for success, and just plain old manners. I have to listen to her because she has wisdom within her that will take me far if I would just listen. I actually learned this from a good friend of mine, Mr. Dirk Bailey. Back in 2008, he shared with me this phrase, "Happy Wife, Happy Life." It's true. Now he and his wife Mrs. Bailey have a beautiful family, in fact one is in college now (Congrats Bria, represent!). Many of my close friends have great marriages resurrected from painful memories, indiscretions, turmoil, and other issues. Many of them have told me, David, you better take care of your wife. Not only is she your best friend, she is your wife, your rib, the one who will keep your together. So some of you guys are like, what is Ol' Dave talking about now? I'm noticing dudes that we take our wives for granted. We treat them any ol' type of way. Most of us only show our wives respect and love when we want to get them in between the sheets like Ron Isley (it's true, don't front). A lot of us think we're supposed to be the man's man, meaning we control everything including our wives as we treat them like government property. We treat their opinions, thoughts, and actions as sub-human from taking the title "head of the household" too far. We suffocate our wives from being who they are supposed to be, heirs with us of the same inheritance in Christ (1st Peter 3:7). We believe our wives are supposed to walk behind us when in God's eyes they are supposed to walk beside us. We're physically, spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and sexually abusive to our wives because we have little patience and compassion with them. Shoot, half of us don't even have a heart to heart talk with our wives, showing our weaknesses before them. We're not even best friends with our wives. That's not what God intended marriage between husbands and wives to be. He wants us to be the best of friends. My dad always tells me that he wouldn't be who he is today without my mom. He knows the power of unity between a husband and wife. So where did all this mess we as husbands come from concerning how we look at our wives? Why do we always blame our wives when all Hades breaks loose in our lives? We get it from Adam. Instead of taking the wrap for his family's hang-ups, he blames Eve, his wife. But it was he who allowed certain things in his life to take place. Just recently, I've had to own up to lot of things happening in my home and stop trying to put my wife at fault (I'm just being honest). My behavior, my treatment of her, my ideologies, my selfishness, my short temper, me, me, it's been me. But thank God for the new me and he is going to love and cherish his wife more and more. When she smiles, when she feels secure, when she feels loved, when she feels she is reaching her purpose in life, then I've done my job as a husband. So take not brothers, stop looking at our wives as just somebody holding you down from being successful. That's a bunch of garbage. Our wives elevate us but when we tear our good women down, then we are definitely going down. Another thing, stop looking at her faults. She's not perfect, shoot, we're probably worse off because of our pride issues. Love them with God's love, which sees past the faults to take care of the needs. Rub their feet, take them to a movie. Talk with them. Sometimes, we got to our busy lives down and spend time with our wives. If they want to get a job, let them get a job. Let them get their education. Let them preach if God has called them to preach (more than just singing, doing testimony services, & looking pretty). Mistreatment of our wives will cause us to lose our favor with God and with men. There are many men I know personally that have made the terrible mistake of throwing away their virtuous women. They lost their favor and now someone else has them. It's a shame but it's true. Why I wrote this blog, it must be God working on this wretched heart. Remember these words from Solomon. The grass ain't greener on the other side. It's better to learn to love our wives as God loves us.

Proverbs 18:22:


"Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord."

Say this with me, My wife is my favor. I treat my favor wrong I might lose it (ask Nabal - 1st Samuel 25).

Til Next Time, dgwo.

Reference:

1st Samuel 25
Songs of Solomon
Proverbs 31
Ephesians 5:25-33