Lessons We Can Learn From Jay-Z's "Adnis"

This past Friday, a bonus edition of Jay-Z's 4:44 LP was released, which includes a song dedicated to his late father called "Adnis." Although I've enjoyed the project, I was anticipating to hear "Adnis" and when I heard it, I was buried with tears. I felt where Jay-Z was coming from because I've been there before with my biological father, "Ben." I listened to that song at least 4 times within a 30 minute period and let my wife listen to it as well. After I played her the song, I cried again.

"Letter to my dad that I never wrote"
Speeches I prepared that I never spoke
Words on a paper that I never read
Proses never penned they stayed in my head (fear to release those emotions)
Jotted on dotted lines, "I'mma fight you nigga" (revenge, anger, hurt, loneliness, abandonment)
Stories that I heard I'm just like you nigga (the apple doesn't fall far from the tree)
Must've been some pain in your past too (in the black community, the cycle of pain never ends...)
Must've been karma that was past due ("the sins of the father/mother are passed to the sons/daughters")
Must've been the energy that passed through (the chance of redemption, the chance the break the cycle of pain)

Ask anybody from my family, I'm the spitting image of my father, down to the way I act. My mom would show me pictures of him when I was a kid to remind me that I had a father (he left us when I was 4). I can remember many times I would be frustrated with my life because I wanted what my other friends and classmates had, a father. I was a very angry kid and it followed me for a long time. One thing I will say, my stepfather, "Daddy Tony" has been an amazing father to me but deep inside, I wanted my father around. There have been periods in my life that we had no contact, sometimes months, most times, years. I went through so much shit, mental shit in my life that no kid before the age of 10 should experience but I did. Sometimes, I say to myself, how would I be if my father was around. Nobody will ever know. I'm a big Jay-Z fan and the second song I heard from the God emcee (besides "Lucky Me") that showed his "mortality" was "This Can't Be Life" (from "The Dynasty" LP). Then I heard "Momma Loves Me" (off "The Blueprint" Vol 1) and boy, that took me through some various emotions (in September 2001, I hadn't heard from my father since June 2000). Fast forward 2017 and this song hits my spirit. The part that got me was this:

"Who would've thought I'd be the dad I never had (maturity)
Be the husband I've become
You, see nothing come from that
I forgive you as I live through the beautiful present of the past (if we choose to...)
I'm just thank that I get all these gifts to unwrap" (lessons, taking the good out of the bad)

I'm a fairly new father as of June 25, 2016 and it's been a terrifying ride. Once my father told me that at least 3 generations of fathers left their families and everyday I fight to break the cycle. I've long forgave my father for all the times he wasn't there, especially after knowing the circumstances he's told me he experienced in his childhood. 2017 has been an interesting year in hip-hop music but to hear a legend of S. Dot come from the throne to tell people, particularly men, his struggles when it comes to fatherhood/childhood/parenthood. "Adnis" is a song of reflection, which I believe is stark reminder of the continual problems in the black community. There are too many single mothers with multiple kids and those kids don't have their father around to love or provide. We've got too may young boys (and girls) walking around angry with the world, hating themselves, and borderline homicidal/suicidal because their father (mothers) is nonexistent (most of the time emotionally/psychologically healthy relationships). This song talks about the culture of abandonment that so many of us in the black community (or anyone of any race for that matter) deals with when the people we love the most leaves us hanging. This song also touches on the problem that the black community has when it comes to drugs and alcohol (oh yeah, this includes me, too). Most importantly, this talks about the black community finally letting go of its ego, its pride, its carelessness, its selfishness, its religion, its excuses, and talk about the various shit that plaques us as individuals as well as families. Albums like Jay-Z's "4:44", Tyler the Creator's "Flower Boy", Vic Mensa's "The Autobiography", and Logic's "Everybody" are wake up calls for us to speak honestly and openly. However, there is reasonable doubt the black community as a whole are listening to the horns to simmer down, sit down, and get real. 

Tim next time.....

Sunday Edition: There Is Life After Jesus

Hello, friends, it's been a long time since I've written a blog; a lot has changed. I'll tell you now, it's taking a lot of out me to write this post because in the black community, this train of thought is frowned upon. It's sort of blasphemous for anyone in the black community not believe in or live for Jesus Christ. In my opinion, it's feels like anyone who doesn't believe is considered worse than a "sinner man." I can say this because in my "christian days", I would go ham on anyone who didn't believe in Jesus, from atheists, to Muslims, to people who experienced "church hurt." I'd "witness" to them about the "love of Jesus" and provide "chapter and verse" to support my work "in Jesus' name."
Today, I'm not that same man and very much a non believer of Jesus.

Since early 2012, my out-processing of the christian faith has been an arduous one. Many of my family and friends don't know that I'm an agnostics, hell, borderline atheist. During this process, I've taken the time to step out of the christian community and analyze things with a broader perspective. I've finally concluded that Jesus is nothing more than a deadbeat father (well, that's if he existed). I see that we in the black community have been indoctrinated to love this "jesus" with all our heart, mind, soul, and strength. We are taught to live for Christ, shame this "devil", pray, believe, go to church, worship him, and wait to go to heaven after we die. Well, that's all lies. I believe, the main reason why many of us believe and serve Jesus is because we are fearful of going to hell.

We are indoctrinated with this and it's caused a cognitive dissonance that muddies reality. We are taught that we are nothing with god and cannot experience success without christ. Hell, nowadays, we're told that anyone who is black with riches and wealth are members of the Illuminati and have sold their souls to Bhapmomet. Lies. Many of us are praying, fasting, worshipping, preaching, singing, and serving yet hear that voice in our spirits saying, "when are you going to give this up?" Some of us maybe hearing our your true conscience saying, "don't you think there is more to your life than doing all of this?" Some of you believe that if you have legitimate doubts about christianity that you are succumbing to the "wiles of the devil." Some of you are in church services nodding your head to the words of a preacher but deep inside you feel like your trapped. Some of you want to do great things with your life but the rules founded in the scriptures and the hypocritical Christian culture have developed mental chains from you doing this.

Many of us believe that if we don't believe in jesus that our lives are over. It's not and believe me, your life will blossom even more without jesus. Some people in my life are hoping that I'll come back home (church and jesus), forget all that my family has experienced, and get back on track. That'll never happen because I'm living a life that's far better than what I had with jesus. My career is really going forward in the right direction (promoted five times within 5 years), a son of my own, new friends who  love me without hidden intentions, and most importantly, me being what I want to be. In the christian religion, I was hammered with achieving the purpose jesus wanted me to have but it was more like me chancing a dangling carrot (and a hamster on a wheel). I had to paint my face with happiness but I was a sad sack of shit. Although I still have problems (like anybody else), I'm finally experiencing happiness.

You see, I've learned and still learning that I don't need to find strength, love, happiness, contentment, or success from somebody I can't see. All of that is in me and it's my responsibility to achieve those accolades. To be quiet honest, it behooves you to do the same. I believe your life will be more blessed without jesus than with jesus. There's no need to serve someone you'll never see in this life or the next (if there is one). There's no need for you to forgive undeserving people because you want "jesus" to forgive you (remember, forgiveness is not given but earned). There's no need for you to give your money in the church's collection plate hoping god will bless you (that money needs to be invested in yourself). It's time to take back the reins of your life and live the life you want to live. This life is limitless and religion (that includes relationship with jesus) only roadblocks your way to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

If your thinking of leaving the faith, I support you. It's not easy because people are going to come at you and try to make you doubt on the decision that works best for you. At the end of it all, there is life after jesus and once you begin living life on your terms, those same people coming at you will be jealous of you. Live the life you want to live, live your truth, live it responsibly, live it with no regrets (at least try to...). If this is you, get out of the pews, walk towards the exit door, open the exit door, and the crazy world around that's called sinful as your place of freedom.

'Til next time....

Silence Within The Black Community

For the past couple of weeks, hip-hop pioneer Afrika Bambaataa has been accused of molestation from people that could've been his victims. After this shit hits the fan, KRS-One comes out to defend one of the founding fathers of hip-hop.

Since the deaths of Trayvon Martin, Mike Brown, and Eric Gardner, an organization called the Black Lives Matter Movement has been on the rise from Ferguson Missouri to Baltimore Maryland. In a nutshell, it's purpose is to bring awareness of crimes against black people by the powers that be, cops and the white man. However, there's a bunch of other shit it doesn't stand for nor won't talk about (I'll get to that later).

Two pastors from the Atlanta area and The Gump Alabama got snitched on by the people they exposed and/or infected with the AIDS/HIV virus. 100 plus pastors secretly had a meeting with Donald Trump, who's openly dissed women, Latinos, and Muslims, and have given their full political affiliation to his cause. Hell, a well known pastor from ATL asked his supporters to donate their taxable incomes to help buy him a 65 million dollar tax write-off plane (which he already bought).

A mother (probably single) from San Antonio Texas was charged with abusing her children, from having two of her children on a leash and the home they all stayed was a shit hole. If anyone who's a father paying child support in the great state of Texas, the majority of custody cases favors women. Let's break it down further. Do you notice child support doesn't go to the kids but to these mothers, who are, as Juvenile termed, "Project Chicks?" The weaves, the nails, the sorry ass men they're screwing while the fathers have to flip the bill.

These different scenarios and more aren't discussed in the black community and anyone who says something politically incorrect (offense to the community), they're blacklisted. Coon, sell-out, Oreo, Uncle Tom, or the devil. However, these different scenarios are running rampant in the black community and it's time they be addressed. Fuck praying and fasting about this shit. Fuck using religion, Jesus, Allah, holy books, and whatever other spiritual monotony to deflect our problems. It's about time to kill the biggest elephants in the room that is still keeping us in the predicaments we're in, blaming slavery and the white man for where we are today.

Yes, the present black community is still feeling the effects of slavery; however, we can't put all the blame on the "white man." You know who we need to blame? We need to blame the people who sold us out for women, land, control, power, money, weapons, and other trade deals; our African ancestors (do your research). Case and point, until we begin to research and educate ourselves on these matters we're going to continue to guidelines laid out for us by the Willie Lynch letters.

Which leads to the ignorance of the BLM movement....

It's funny how BLM talk about the injustices white people and the police have incurred against blacks. They look for a black person to get knocked off by police so they can torch neighborhood businesses, people's cars, people's houses, loot stores, march, and scream at police barricades. However, when a 9 year old girl in Ferguson Missouri was killed by a stray bullet from a probable act of gang activity. Was there a march, looting, and rioting for her? A couple of months ago, right here in The Gump, some innocent folks got shot by some black ass-wipes over nothing. When a elderly gentleman got shot by a cop (after a struggle in the dead of night), here comes BLM showing their muscles. Let's not forget about the high murder rates in places like Chicago Illinois and the widespread drug trades/gang activity in Kinston North Carolina. Hell, when two black cops killed a white young boy in New Orleans, there was hardly any press about this tragedy. Where is BLM at these places? Where are the marches and the protests denouncing these behaviors within the black community? If someone who knows about these different crimes, they keep their mouths shut in fear of retribution from some niggly hoodlums.

Molestation is real and it's rampant, from the projects, to the suburbs, to the schools, and in the church. Shit, I'm of this bullshit and to this day, I'm still working to unravel myself from its effects in my life. There's a code of silence in our community when it comes to this matter. When people who do this shit to others, namely children, mentally disabled, the disadvantaged, and elderly, we're told to keep this shit a secret. But do you know what happens when you keep a secret like this? It fucks with you. For some, they go to drugs, some to alcohol, others to promiscuity, some to suicide, and some of the abused become the abuser. When someone is dealing with these issues, we're quick to say it's sin, the devil, and don't help them seek professional help. They don't have the forums, places, or freedom to express the pain that's been inflicted. They are told to forgive their abusers, let the pain go, and move it along It's easier said than done and these victims bear the weight of this shame; however, their abusers get away "Scott Free." Therefore, the cycle of molestation continues and god-damn if a public figure gets outed, the first reaction by us in the black community is to defend them.

Which leads me to my next point.....these bum ass, no job having ass preachers.....

Out of the various pastors/preachers getting outed for exposing/infecting people (men & women) of HIV/AIDS, one got sentenced to prison and the other one, well, he just lost his church (which is still gong on to this day, why?). After the media railroaded this well-known ATL pastor for his multi-million dollar acquisition, he plays the defense and accuses the media of being "agents of Satan." The fucked up part is that he's got that plane, flying wherever he wants to go (and probably not for ministerial reasons), and nobody can do shit about it. Well, something could be done about it but that would need members of the black community to vacate his services every week and take their talents (time, money, skills) elsewhere. However, many like the members of this pastor's congregation are brainwashed, indoctrinated, and told "not to touch the Lord's anointed." Most of us in the black community are afraid of questioning these pastors/preachers because we feel that if we do so, hell and God's displeasure is our fate.

Since the 1980s, the church and the gospel of Christ hasn't helped the black community deal with the epidemic of HIV/AIDS. Instead of providing condoms, proper sex education, and awareness of this still fatal disease, we're told to "marry than burn in sexual sin." We're told to be sexually pure (not have sex) but in many instances, people do what they're told not to do. For some reason, some of us hate condoms and get infected with various diseases. One gets an STD from another and then they infect someone else. Then they keep this shit a secret and as the hands in worship services go up and as the offering plates get full, people are a walking petri dish in Jesus' name (especially in the black gay/bi-sexual male and heterosexual black female communities-i.e. - CDC).

And this leads to my next point, child abuse......

What this mother did to her kids is fucked up but it's just an open door to what's going on in the black community. The extension cords, the brutal beat downs, the verbal abuse, the sexual abuse, impoverished living arrangements, crime, credit fraud against under aged children, and high rates of single mothers; all in the black community. Some of these products are residual effects from the generational cycles laid upon us since slavery. My question is, when is it going to be addressed?

There are a bunch of other situations prevalent in our community I don't have the time to touch on. I decided to put these on the table because these three different types are fucking up our bodies, our minds, our hearts, and our spirits. We're allowing sensationalized media, traditions, and bandwagon views keep us from telling the truth; hell, being the truth. And God isn't going to come off his/her throne to save us. Stop believing in fairy tales. It's time for us to take off the iron masks from our heads and stop being silent. It's time for us to be logical and reasonable. Take it from a man who's fighting to unravel himself from being a nigger into a human being. We've got our kids to help in a world, in a society, that makes it hard for us to be and do as we please.

Take Care. DgWo

Should We Always Forgive?

I've wanted to put my thoughts down about this topic for a while because I believe the conversation about forgiveness is discussed from a religious perspective; not from a logical perspective. Since Christianity is the monopoly of American culture, we are indoctrinated from birth it's mandatory for us to "forgive others that God may forgive us." If we "don't forgive, God won't forgive us" and we don't question this pseudo "mandate from heaven." Today, I'd like to question it because I believe it's complete and utter bullshit. I believe we shouldn't always have a forgiving heart when people do us or anyone else dirty. So with this post, I'd like to point out a couple of things we need to logically investigate the food that's been fed to us for years based on writings to make us counter-productive when it comes to conflict resolution within ourselves, between others, and the option of forgiveness. Please, let's put our Korans, Bibles, and degrees down; let's think logically and intricately.


1. Should we forgive people when they continuously, knowingly, and with great severity harm us and others?  HELL NO. For the majority of my life, I've lived in the Bible Belt, North Carolina, South Carolina, Texas, and Alabama. Within the past few months, I've brought up the issue of forgiveness when it comes to this question. Do you want to know what the answers were? I'm glad you asked. "Jesus said, we've got to forgive our brothers (sisters) seventy times seven." "If we don't forgive others, God won't forgive us, and if we die with unforgivness in our hearts, we'll go to hell." "Unforgiveness holds you back while the people that hurt you are moving on with our lives, not even thinking about you." Does this apply to those people who've been lied to over and over and over again by financial specialists (bankers, investors, loan holders, insurance agents) and have their monies /credit drained to the bone marrow without apology? What about those men and women who were rape or sexual abuse by a family member repeatedly but their abuser never apologies or confesses? Come to think about it, what about those service members who were raped (and reported it to their "superiors) yet their abusers are protected by the powers that be, excel in their military careers, and never apologize to their victim(s)? Should a parent continue to forgive their kids who continually steal, lie, and cheat (with crocodile tear apologies)? What about those people who know what they're doing is wrong and still fucking people over? Should people in these situations forgive those who've wronged them? There are a lot of people I've screwed over in my lifetime, some I haven't apologized for my actions. To be quiet honest, shit, I may never confess or apologize for bullshit I've done (the dichotomy of man, haha). Should they forgive me? Should people forgive me after knowing what I've done to them I'm also knowingly and consistency doing to others? Do you think the court of law forgives people who commit multiple offenses (murder, tax evasion, fraud, child neglect, etc.)? Put yourself in that position and think about it.

2. Does God really not forgive people who won't forgive others?  HELL NO. I recently had a conversation about this and of course I get the well-known answer I've been getting my entire life. "We have to forgive others that God will forgive us"; all of which is based on a book written by men to control other men (more so the common, working, poor men/women/children of any society). Honestly, will a God who's infinite, omnipotent, omniscient, and is forever not forgive mortals who rightly hold unforgiveness towards people ? Doesn't make any sense yet people continue to think otherwise. How do we know if God turns his or her back on us because we refuse to forgive others? Within the context of Christian culture, when something tragic happens (financial, loss of life, etc.), that's God's judgment upon us. Well, that's complete bullshit because we can't control the ever-changing tides of life and death. We don't know what the hell is on God's mind, no matter if we're the pope, an imam, an apostle, or a shaman. God can't be held in the box of our thinking or some pseudo "holy" book. It's also absurd to think God will forgive a person (who gets away with an offense) who "seemingly" has a repentant heart rather than someone who doesn't forgive another person who continually fucks up others' lives. Come on, people, put on your thinking caps, put away your indoctrination; put on logic and reason. It's time we stop being scared of going to hell based on what judgmental people say and some pseudo holy book masterminded by the Flavian dynasty (research it).

3. Forgiveness versus confrontation? Forgiveness is not easy and should only be given to those who are truly repentant for what they've done (not just with their words/tears but with their deeds). I've noticed within the past 2, maybe 3 years, I've seen people take the forgiveness route because it's the easiest. Instead of confronting those who wronged them, they just pray for them, let it go, and say the old adage, "forgive them Father for they don't know what they're doing." I also noticed that those same people they refuse to confront are still to this day, as a venomous snake, debilitating countless others with their poison. The sad part of it is, they're still cordial with these people and the cycle of offenses, kept silent, continues (especially in the black community). There's a term in the psychology world called "Fight or Flight." Many of these environments I've been in, people would rather forgive (or say they do) than confront. Running away by way of forgiving bypasses our chance to unload the hurt we have inside our minds and hearts. It allows us to confront those that have hurt us (and vice versa) and we have to go through the arduous process of moving on. Speaking of letting it go, we can never be like God, who men have written, "sins are thrown into the sea of forgetfulness." Remember, we are not deities, we are human beings and it's our right to feel whatever human emotions we have, as long as we don't harm others. We can't just through the pain we received just like that, it takes a lot of work and a lot of time for us to make it "manageable." For some of us, forgiveness is easier and we just go on with life without telling others about themselves; however, some of us want confrontation. Either way, we want our houses to be square again, meaning, we want peace within ourselves and a good night's sleep.

4. Do we have to forgive? It's a catch 22. Ultimately, it's up to us whether or not forgiveness is an option. It's not up to our families, it's not up to our friends, it's not up to a preacher, hell, it's not up to God. We have to do what's best for us as individuals, not what's best for the people, environments, and society around us. So, if we choose to forgive, don't forgive for the sake of your fear that God won't forgive you or will send you to hell. When you forgive, you're doing it because you have sympathy for the other person, regardless if they knowingly or unknowingly fucked you over. For some of us, we just do because we don't have time to hold on to anger towards others (but that doesn't mean we have to respect them). If we choose not to forgive, don't feel bad about it and don't let some fuck ass holy roller make you feel bad, either. Some bullet wounds go so deep, the pain will never go away. Sometimes, the people you don't forgive, you tried to reason with them but they continue to "middle finger u" and keep on doing what they do best to somebody else. Whenever I bring this subject up or about my past experiences, people say, "you've got bitterness in your heart and you need to let it go." That's funny, I wonder if they'd say that to people who've experienced worse shit than me? Probably not. Damn, this is a sticky subject but man, we as individuals have to make that decision and learn to be at peace with it.

Oh yeah, for those who choose not to forgive and you express your views to some "holy rollers", here's something for you:

The following link is the definition of bitterness, http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/bitterness. It's very different from what we've been indoctrinated to believe. This blew my mind.

Take it from me, don't allow your emotions to take you to the deep end and rob you of what life presently and in future has for you (good/bad/ugly). Trust me on that one....

For those who choose to forgive and/or not to forgive, I feel you and you have every right to feel that way. People who don't walk in your shoes don't understand your pain. They never will because they're on the outside looking in. All you can do is keep making your life better and realize that you're doing the right thing. Remember this, forgiveness isn't given, it's earned, just like everything else in this crazy world.

Take care, dGwO.

Do Black Lives Really Matter?

This has been a tumultuous year for the overall black community. Sandra Bland, Christian Taylor, etc, the list of black people dead at the hands of law enforcement is overwhelming. I'm pretty sure tragedies that have been tagged as "race related" will continue in America. As I was taught 20 years ago, "you're going to see a lot things happen when you all become adults." Mr. King wasn't lying but some others are. For the past couple of months, maybe longer, we've been introduced to the hashtag, "Black Lives Matter." For the average person, it's very easy to jump on the bandwagon, go to protests, march, and voice our outcry against injustices toward blacks. As I look deeper into the black community (also the move from Texas to Alabama helped), I'm seeing a lot of hypocrisy in my community. The revamped notion of "the white man" is in full effect. I agree, there are still signs of racism in this country. Truthfully, there's racism in all races against other races in this country. Now the Black Lives Matter campaign is climbing the mountain top in a pseudo MLK fashion (which most of our "newer" black generation don't know). But we don't see Jackson or Sharpton walking through the streets of Chicago to simmer down the senseless killings due to black on black crime. - Side note - Hell, thesdopportunists were disallowed in the Ferguson situation. - We don't see black social (empowerment) groups in the South demanding TV time to address the AIDS/HIV problems in the black community (mostly from 16-24). We don't hear black preachers condemn other preachers/churches from swindling "the saints" of their time and money just to please "Jesus." Black communities aren't coming together to put public school systems in check to provide better educational resources for their children. Unless Oprah touches it, the black community is very hush on the rampant sexual abuses of our children. As soon as a cop (no matter the race), "kills" a black person, we tear up black and/or locally owned businesses that support a community than tear up the places (government buildings/etc) that are perpetuating our broken legal/penal systems. Unlike the stars of the 60s and 70s, which were doers, we Facebook/Twitter "reporters" are bullshitters. We have become slaves to sensationalized media and unable to form individual opinions. As W.E.B. Dubois once said, "we do things to impress others", meaning we become members of groupthink than be our own man/woman. You see, I know that black lives don't matter to blacks no matter how we spin it. Growing up in the 80s' crack/cocaine/AIDS epidemic, I see those same problems still don't matter to us now (get it). Just last week, a white kid was killed by a cop for no reason. Are we acknowledging this? What about the illegal immigrants being funneled through the sex and drug trade? Do their lives matter? For us "black folk", we're the only folks deserving justice including a pacifier and 40 acres with a mule. Fuck that. It's time to change the way we think and it starts by educating ourselves. But knowing us, "black folk", self-education without externally forced behavioral modification, will not happen. In my opinion, there are poor whites and other races/ethnicities that have or are worse victims than us. All Lives Matter, a perspective coming from a man whose been across the world. Don't you see the American citizen, no matter the race, are persecuted by the same maniacal force? To the average black person, we're the only victim.

Till next time....

You Can Keep Your "Jesus"

If anyone believes on the name of Jesus, the same will be saved. That's a street version quote from the book of Romans. Centuries later, this phrase has been used to give people the power, authority, and dominion in the "earth realm." Yes, this is so true and millions are spirits are being led astray from the Jesus they need to know about. For the past few months, I've been thinking on a scripture I used to read a lot and only understood from the "churchy" perspective. To corner phrase, "who has tricked you?" Another says, "anyone talking about another Jesus that you received on a one on one basis, let him be cursed." I guess a lot of ho-hum, spirit filled, tongue taking, handclapping, tithe giving, hands raising Chrisitians didn't read the email. Even the man himself warns to heed the voice of reason (truth) so you won't heed the voice of another (wolves). I and millions of  others allowed ourselves to be tricked, hitched, and our necks slit. We get baited into believing that we have the "Holy Ghost" by speaking with tongues as the spirit gives utterance (yet lack common sense and other cultural skills to be successful in this world). If this isn't happening, we aren't filled and technically not "saved." We are taught to give our 10 percent of our gross earnings while the government takes less than that from our paycheck. If we don't give them we're not blessed but cursed. We are taught that to live the Chrisitian life we have to go to church. If we don't go to church, we are subjected to the whims of this "world." We are taught that God gives us pastors after his own heart to lead, guide, impart, and release us into "ministry." If not, we will never walk in the "fullness of God." One word for all this-Mess." For over a year now, people say, you're saying all this because you've been hurt by the church. That's bs too because my outprocess from chrisitanity began as early as summer 2012. I saw that the world isn't wicked, just the a-holes we allow to have power and control. I learned that a lot of stuff I've learned since a child to adulthood doesn't work for me. I learned that since a child, I've only known this "Jesus" that will accept you into heaven if you do this, this, and this..... Presently, we are seeing chrisitanity and the institution of "church" for what is really is yet those who are a part of the "Babylonian" system have their eyes blinded by the gods of this age (pastors, fake apostles and prophets, teachers, and evangelists). They, just as I did, enable a system that continues to indoctrinate folks into a thought process that dumbs that 99% of their human intelligence. People are shunning "the gospel" because they know it's propaganda is being used to turn out people like pimps to hoes. This "Jesus" proclaimed by the majority of Chrisitans isn't Jesus at all. The Jesus in the gospels didn't exclude people unless those people were excluding others from knowing God for themselves without a preacher or man-made doctrines. The Jesus I know (I'll agree with Carlton on this one) wants everybody to know God for themselves; everybody. The Jesus I know only judged the world of folks that's making life difficult for the masses, not everyone who's not a part of the church. Hell, the Jesus I know didn't preach separatism because one sins differently than the next person. That's the real Jesus, not this con artist that's quoting Abraham to support a preacher buying a 65 million dollar plane. Yeah, it may sound like I'm pissed again but that's not the case. I would like to see more people see that this Jesus they believe in is nothing but a ICE train to nothing. I guess Kanye was right after all....

Just my opinion.....

Where Is The Love?

The older I get, as the times change, I'm seeing that love has become a superficial word we as a society to use. Stevie Wonder had a song that posed this question back in the 90s. Almost 20 bullets later, his truth looks absolute. I believe more and more people are becoming sociopaths to be honest. Hell, I see sociopathic tendencies in my own behavior. This morning I had to accord that I've allowed life to "trip me up." I realized that love is it already has left my heart. Or maybe I'm feeling the effects of what I perceive going on around me. Mothers are turning against their daughters. Fathers abandon their sons. Friends turn on each other. Someone catches the raw end of the deal and if they don't have a shoulder to cry on, the hurt go out into the world hurting others. I've distanced myself so I don't become the asshole others have been to me. I'll tell you right now, within the past two weeks, I've seen the total disparity of  humanity, from family, to job, to religion. All I have to ask is, where is the love? How can family members say they love each other but put knives in each other's back? How can churches/preachers  say they love God but condemn others unlike them? How can friends friend enemies; thereby betray their other friends to run with their enemies? How can spouses think so lowly of each other when things get hard? Ask yourself, where is the love in your love? 

Til Next Time.....